I’m sensitive
Like extra sensitive
Not like
“I’ma tell mommy on you
For making fun of me” sensitive
But “a couple movies
(one or more may or may not
Have been made by Disney)
Some sad songs here or there
And some of my own poetry
Has made me cry at some point” sensitive
Don’t judge me
I like chocolate
To say I’m obsessed with it
Would be an understatement
3 Musketeers, M&Ms
Kit Kats & Crunch bars
Are some of the greatest
Cavity creators ever
But they’re not my favorite sweet
Top spot
Goes to cherry flavored
Twizzlers
Pull N’ Peel
Go Figure
Don’t judge me
The Beatles
Madonna
Elvis Presley
& Bruce Springstein
Can all kiss my ass
Simultaneously
Yeah….
I said it
Don’t judge me
If they had boxed DVD sets
Of the seasons of
Rugrats, Eureka’s Castle
Gullah Gullah Island
Original Power Rangers
Recess, Dexter’s Laboratory
& The Powerpuff Girls
I’d buy them all
Don’t judge me
Now that I think about it
Some of the songs from
The Backyardigans
And Dora The Explorer
Are dope
Shut up
Don’t judge me
Since we’re talking about my childhood
I’ve had only two incidents
Where I’ve urinated
But somehow all the pee
Landed on me
Publicly
Don’t judge me
One of which was in 3rd grade
Back when they had a bathroom
In each classroom
I’m standing there
Facing the toilet
When I notice the door’s open
A little bit
A freshly mopped floor plus
Pants and ninja turtle undies
Around my ankles are the things
I forget
When I foolishly reach for the
Doorknob
To grab it
So what happens??
I slip
Trip
Landing on my back
Never forgetting
The feeling of my urine
Hitting my own lips
Stop laughing
Don’t judge me
The worst experience
I’ve ever had sexually
(well one of the worst experiences
Of my life in general actually)
Was when I lost my
Virginity
To this day
I’m still reminded of it
Anytime I see
A girl eating
Buffalo wings
Don’t judge me
I’ve both loved too hard and not enough
Don’t judge me
Sometimes I play too much
Don’t judge me
I lack confidence
Don’t judge me
I’ve broken too many hearts… including my own
Don’t judge me
My friends and family are so much better than yours
Don’t judge me
I hate asking for help
Don’t judge me
As you can see… I like to crucify myself
Don’t judge me
Despite my insecurities
Embarrassing yet hilarious stories
The fact I can face accept and laugh
At these things
Just add to my glory
Maybe you should do the same
Maybe you should put a mirror
In ya brain
To reflect on your memories
Maybe transparent is the way to be
I know for me
It saved me
From me
So do me a favor
Judge and then love yourself
Await the verdict
From your own jury
I’ve received mine already
Making it real easy
For me to speak
Don’t judge me
