Detox

I don't want to be here
But I have to be
In order to save myself
I am here

You can still hear me
Days later
From when I was first being dragged
By my hands & feet
Kicking & screaming
Across the street
Into the car
Driven far into
The middle of nowhere
Until I ended up
Here

The reason why I'm here is
I still have the same hallucinations
That I'm ok
That my life's supposed to stay
This way
That she's supposed to be the one
That I'm supposed to
work here
Live there
And actually care
For other people's welfare

"It's hell here"
I've already got it in my head
That
To the world I must be dead

I'm going to rehab... yes
I can see it now
My body rejects the process
So I'm being held down
By the people that are only
trying to help
But my mind refuses them

The drugs are so potent
They got me wanting those same saviors to supply me with more
Of the thing that
Ablitterates my dreams & hopes
So in the needle goes
To sedate
And keep my mind & body straight

Standing outside the gates
My brain gets brusied
From the epiphany that hits
I've got to get this
Long extended list
Of Sick &
Twisted
Illnesses
Out my
System.
Its
Killing me
To care so much about
What happens
Around me
Without reciprocity

Detox is the process I need
To be rid of the intoxications
That slowly destroy me
The anger
The happiness
The frustration
The sadness
The jealousy
The gladness
The hate
The love
gotta leave

So excuse me
While I walk into
My destiny
To rearrange my life
So I can tell the difference
Of what's fantasy
And what's reality

Because honestly

This hiatus

Just might be

The thing to save

Me

You

And Us